Trusting Fate Read online

  “Why do you think you would never remember it?” I asked curiously.

  She looked like she was not comfortable answering that question. Shit what do I do now? I don’t want to jeopardize my chances here.

  “I just used to do things that I have a hard time remembering, that’s all," she said. I left it at that.

  We ate and talked about all sorts of things, like how she hates mushrooms and anything with tomatoes and how I love both of those in any food. Not really anything important, but listening to her talk about her life was exciting to me. I wanted to know it all.

  “So Gabby, tell me about Theo. He seems like a great kid,” I said. Crap did I just ask about her son? She didn’t seem mad.

  “He is great. He is so smart and I am not just saying that because he is my son. Enrolling him in preschool was such a great idea because it just made him shine. I used to be a totally different person and his birth came as a big shock to me, so shocking actually, considering that I don't have too many memories of the night he was conceived,” she said, looking very embarrassed. “Before you think anything negative of me, please let me explain. I was young and really stupid. I remember the early part of the night, but I do not remember how I got home, much less how I got pregnant. After that night I got really depressed and stopped going out for a few weeks, so I knew that it had to have happened that night. I am not even sure why I am telling you this, but I guess you seem easy to talk to,” she said, looking down at her hands twisting in her lap.

  Could she really not know? “Gabby, please do not worry about what I think about you. Honestly, who hasn’t made bad choices when they were young? I mean, I am full of them. But like me, you grew up, and I would say that you are doing a hell of a lot better job at it than I am. I mean, I may seem all put together and successful, but this job fell into my lap. I wanted nothing to do with my family's company, then tragic circumstances took over and I had no choice but to take it. We all have demons we're wrestling with, but it's okay,” I said, reaching across the table and grabbing her hand. She looked up at me and smiled the most angelic smile I had ever seen. If I thought I was hooked on her all those years ago, I was dead wrong…Gabriella Thomas had sunk her teeth into me and was not about to let go, and I didn’t want her to.

  We finished eating and sat for a little while longer, sipping on wine and talking about our lives. Everything that came out of her mouth was fascinating to me. I could not help but be as excited about the things she talked about as she was. These feelings were very foreign to me but I am not complaining because it’s a side of me that is new and exciting. Like a dream that I never want to wake up from.

  “Gabby, this was really nice. I had fun and I would love to do this again. I know that we work together and I don’t want anything to be weird between us there, but I just cannot help myself,” I said. Geez, that sounded pathetic.

  She smiled, “Jace, I had a great time too. I have to admit I have been really intimidated by you and I do not mean that in a bad way. It makes me nervous to start this because of work, but I find myself thinking about it all the time. My life is really complicated and my son is my first priority, but if you can have patience with me, I would like to see you again too,” she smiled that angelic smile. Her smile is going to be the end of me.

  Chapter 8

  Gabby

  The fact that last night was one of the best nights I have had in a long time is making me late and nervous for work this morning. I crept in around 11 last night and tried to give Tay the details as best as I could without blushing so much. She was not buying it and called me out on my crap right away.

  “Gabriella Thomas, you like him! I can see it all over your face,” she said.

  Yeah, the truth is I do like him, but I am incredibly nervous to face him today because I know that I will turn beet-red the second I see him. Putting the finishing touches on my makeup and slipping on my shoes, I walked into the kitchen to find my sweet little boy still eating his cereal.

  “Hey buddy, almost done?” I said. He picked up his bowl and slurped up all the milk.

  “All done, Mommy. Is it time to go already?” he asked.

  I smiled and said, “Yes baby, it’s time to go. Go wash your hands and get your jacket on.”

  We were out the door three minutes later, I dropped him off, and made my way to work.

  “It’s okay, Gab, you can do this,” I said to myself in the rearview mirror. I checked my makeup again and I set off to face my day. I quickly sat down at my desk and began to work, noticing that Jace’s office door was closed. He normally leaves it open when he is here, so he must not be in yet. I powered up my computer and started working. I had a bunch of work to do, and Jace never lets me work through my lunch like I would like to when I am busy, so I had to get started right away.

  I worked nonstop for hours, waiting for him to show up, but he didn’t. Finally around 12 o’clock, I emailed him asking if he was going to be in today. Almost instantly, I got a reply from him saying that he would be late today due to meetings. That’s strange; I know his schedule and he didn’t have any meetings today. Could he have changed his mind and not want to date me outside of work? Great, just great. It was something I said I am sure. The possibility made me angry, but I quickly brushed it aside and got back to work. It was 3 p.m. and still no Jace. Not even a call or an email letting me know his status in his meetings.

  Jace

  I spent the entire night awake thinking about her and literally got no sleep. It was worry and excitement, and as much as I wanted to be with her I was nervous to find out the truth about Theo’s father. I feared the more time I spent with her and got to know him, I would fall in love with them both…I had to get to the bottom of this. My biggest fear was that she wouldn't want me after finding out the truth, whether I am his father or not. I set out to get in touch with some other contacts to see how I could do a paternity test...legally.

  She just needs to know the truth and I want to be the one to give it to her, whether she hates me for it or not. Everything I know about life and the way I have always wanted to live mine has all gone totally out the freaking window since I met her. I had to pretend like I had a few meetings today because I am completely overwhelmed and just cannot think straight with her right outside my office. My body responds to everything she does. Her smile…my God that mouth makes me want to drop to my knees and be her slave for life. Her gorgeous body is enough to drive a man out of his bloody mind. I mean, why would some perfect creature like her be created if not to taunt men and make us feel not even worthy enough to be in the same room with her? I cannot skip work every day just to avoid her. I have to get my shit together and figure this out...so I can be with her every damn day for the rest of my life. Christ, I sound like a pathetic stalker. Shaking my head, I brush the thought away because I really do not care. Gabriella Thomas was mine that night and if fate is on my side then maybe Theo was mine too.

  Chapter 9

  Gabby

  I had horrible thoughts, truly hateful thoughts, about Jace the whole way home. Why would he be avoiding me? Is it because I do not know who Theo’s father really is? I tried to find out. It’s not as if the bars I hung out in paid any attention to the men I took home with me…there were too many to count. I knew the bartenders well at most places, but they wouldn’t have given a second thought to me wandering outside with a strange man, because that wasn’t their job; their job was to serve alcohol and they did that well.

  I finally got Theo to bed, which seemed like it took forever. He had been restless the past few nights. He was tired and did not want to eat his dinner. I thought that maybe he was getting sick, but he didn't have any symptoms or a fever. I am probably worrying too much; it was an emotion that I was not accustomed to until I became a mother. So sittin
g outside his bedroom door listening to his breathing and light snore is music to my ears. Knowing that he can sleep through the night without me is also depressing. My son could sleep through anything, which is both a good quality and a bad one. It’s great when I am dead tired which is most days but it is bad when he is sick and does not wake up to tell me he is feeling bad. I guess I am just concerned with how fatigued he seems. I wish I knew his family history on his father’s side. Gee, that would be great. Another mistake on my end. I get so frustrated with myself, but I have to try and get past this. Someday I will…someday, but not today.

  I was relaxing in my favorite new chair that I got when we moved into this place, I decided to get my Kindle out and relax with a glass of wine. I rarely got to do that. No matter how badly I wanted to read this book and not think about Jace, I could not do it. My life had done a complete 180, and while I was not actively looking for love, I had gone on my share of dates every so often. So why now? And furthermore, why with someone who seemed interested and pursued me to the end of the earth and then ignored me like the plague? Of course, it had only been one day but still, why was I obsessing so much over this man? Sure he has great facial features, and he looks better in a suit than any man could ever possibly look in one, and he has these beg-for-me eyes…I mean, for me that is like a drug. I quickly sat up from my chair. That is what this was. It was like he was pulling me back to my old self. I was not a bad person; I just did not care about myself or what I was doing unless I was getting drunk or getting off…I don’t want to think of a man, especially Jace, as a drug. I want to think of him as an antidote and only he can cure me.

  Ugh, just relax Gabby. He is not the first man to come into your life. Stop obsessing. My subconscious is really annoying today. I lay back in my chair, quickly realizing I was exhausted, and I finally gave in to the madness and fell asleep.

  Chapter 10

  Jace

  So stalker is apparently my thing. I am literally sitting outside this woman’s house. No matter what I do, she is always on my mind. I feel this abnormal possessive emotion toward her. Like I want to own her body and soul. Wow, that sounds creepy when I think really hard about it. She makes me feel…that is really all that matters. After I lost my brother I did not want to feel anything but whisky rolling down my throat and a warm body next to mine. When Gabby talked about her past she had no idea how similar we truly were. Our first night out I saw this new light in her eyes that I had never seen in anyone before, like maybe I had a real chance. So now I have gone and avoided her like she did something wrong and I'm sitting outside her house being a creeper.

  I remember something Denny, my brother had said to me when he was going on dates with girls and I had no interest yet…he said. “Jace, there will come a day when you fall…you will fall so hard with your feet in the air over your head that you won’t be able to tell which way is up or down and she will change you. She will forever change your world and how you see it.” I probably rolled my eyes because he was with a different girl every week, and at 17 that was how it was. But for me I never, I mean I never wanted to fall in love.

  I think I fell for Gabby the night I met her, as drunk as she was she had this energy about her and it was her skin and her smile and her voice, and…oh Christ, just get out of the car and knock on her damn door. I gathered the courage, got out of the car, and walked up her driveway.

  I knocked on the door and held my breath…

  Gabby

  I was awakened by a knock at my door, and it scared the living daylights out of me. Who in world could that be at my door at 10 p.m.? I got up and grabbed my robe, I had gotten hot earlier so I had put on my silk nightgown…now I felt ridiculous wearing this and answering my front door. I tied the strings of my sash and peeked out the window to see who it was. “Are you freaking kidding me?” I said to myself. What was he doing here? It’s bad enough I am mad at the man while lusting over him 24/7, but he decided to show up now? I took a couple of big deep breaths and answered the door.

  “Hi Gabby,” he said, flashing me his glorious smile. Damn him.

  “Jace, it’s really late. What are you doing here? It’s 10 at night, and Theo is sleeping,” I said sternly. If I didn’t know better I would say he'd have to be drunk. But believe me, I knew better.

  “Gabby, please do not be mad at me over today. I know that you have my schedule and know that I was not in meetings today. Just please let me explain,” he pleaded. It was then that he looked me up and down, he must have noticed the nightgown I was wearing under my robe. “Christ Gabby, this is why I was not in today. I literally cannot be in the same room with you without my pants growing in size…and you answer the door like this? Who were you waiting for? Tell me who!” he said. He was angry and I am not sure why part of me liked it, but I was not his to begin with so why bother trying to defend myself.

  “Not that it’s any of your business, but it was hotter than Haiti in my house earlier, so I put a nightgown on,” I said. He looked down like he knew I had just called him on his crap.

  “Gabby I’m sorry, I just cannot help myself around you. I feel…I feel so possessive like you are mine and no one better touch you but me,” he confessed. His honesty was sweet but why lie to me?

  “Jace, I appreciate the candor, I do, but you lied to me today. You made me feel the one thing I haven’t felt in a really long time…and that’s dread. I was terrified and I have worked hard, I mean really hard, to not be vulnerable to any man ever again. I just need to know what this is between us. I mean, we have gone on one date, which if I have to be honest was all I needed. I knew that I was a goner that night, but I told you that my life is complicated. Did you freak out because I told you that I do not know who Theo’s father is?” I asked. He blushed. Caught ya. I knew that was it.

  “No, it’s not that. Believe me when I say it’s so not that. It’s how I think about you every single day of my existence…” he said, stepping closer to the door and closer to me. “It’s how I dream about you at night, or how I think about your body and your smile with every breath I take,” he said, almost panting.

  Shit I’m a goner, I am so gone and I need him so much it’s like needing the air I breathe. Without even thinking, I leaned forward and our lips met. It was like a wick meeting a flame. It blew me away, I had never felt so much passion and I had my share of men.

  He pushed us through the doorway, picking me up so that I was straddling his body, and the kissing just kept going. Before I knew it, he had me on top of my dining room table and he was kissing the insides of my thighs. I was writhing with pleasure, my body was on fire and this man was doing it. Things just kept going further and further until I heard what I thought was vomiting in the other room.

  “Wait, stop. I am so sorry. Jace, I think Theo is awake.” I said almost embarrassed. He pulled himself off of me and looked almost as flushed as I felt.

  I ran down the hall and found Theo standing over the toilet throwing up. “Oh baby boy, what’s wrong? Does your belly hurt?” I asked, stroking his back.

  “It hurts bad, Mommy. I don’t know why. I was rolling around in bed for a real long time because it hurts so bad. And Mommy, I am so cold. Why am I so cold?” he whimpered. It broke my heart. This was Theo’s first stomach bug.

  I quickly changed his sheets and pajamas, and then before I could even turn out his light he was already asleep again. I laid a trashcan down in front of his bed and left his door open. I realized as I was walking out of his room that Jace was still here. Oh crap. I raced down the hall into the living room.

  “Jace, I am so sorry, he got sick to his stomach. I shouldn’t have been so irresponsible. Maybe we should call it a night, because I know I smell like vomit,” I said putting my head down to look at my feet. I heard him laugh softly and he grabbed my chin and tilted my head
up to meet his eyes.

  “Gabby, it’s not like I have never smelled vomit before; really do not worry about it at all. If you don’t mind, I can help you clean up. Do you have a washer and dryer?” he asked so calmly like this wouldn’t be the grossest date ever. I nodded my head and motioned for him to come with me, smiling the whole way.

  I watched him trying to figure out which one was the washer and which was the dryer.

  “Jace, see the one with the lid on top?” I said giggling. “That is the washer.”

  “Of course. I knew that,” he said looking embarrassed. We laughed and talked for a few hours in my laundry room. Every once in a while, I crept back into Theo’s room to check on him. He did not seem to be running a fever, so I guess it was just something that he ate.

  Spending time with Jace so domestically was really a turn on for me. Watching him fold sheets and the way his muscles moved up and down was enough to make a girl combust. Geez, Gabby, calm down.

  I had to keep myself in check, refusing to try to jump this man while my sick child slept in the other room. But I had to admit that I really wanted see more of Jace on a personal level. Being with him just felt natural, like the fact that he almost ran me over with his car was supposed to happen. I never used to believe in fate but when I got pregnant with Theo and he changed my entire life, I became a believer. I truly think that fate stepped in and gave me this gift of Theo to save my life. So far he has done just that.